Justice and Mercy

8/5/08

I've been thinking a lot about justice and mercy. Thinking that while at Andre House I need to be either just or merciful. Just, as in, treating everyone the same - fair. Merciful, as in, treating each person as an individual - making exceptions. God is showing me that I don't need to choose one or the other. The Lord is a God of Justice and Mercy. I then begin to wonder, "how do I know when to be firm and just and when to be compassionate and merciful?" Christ is leading me to invite the Holy Spirit to lead my actions. The Spirit will show me what is right. What a wonderful gift the Holy Spirit is!
I feel that although I've only just began working at Andre House, I'm beginning to see that my spiritual journey is going to get more difficult before it gets easier. Lately, I've been appealing to the Lord in prayer in an extremely desperate way - truly dependent. I knew this time would be one of voluntary physical poverty, but I'm finding that I am falling into a wonderful spiritual poverty as well, although remaining in the Lord's consolation.
I know what I'm experiencing is good and of the Lord, but my heart is still filled with intense fear. I'm afraid of how Christ will change me. Although I know of it's goodness, I still fear. The scriptures say that a Christian cannot be in the flesh and the spirit and truly I intend and desire to live only in the spirit.. still I fear.
More than any other phrase in the bible Jesus says, "Do not fear/ be not afraid." I pray that my heart be filled with the peace of Christ and accept that life in the spirit fulfills and is the ultimate goal. I believe Lord, help my unbelief.